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The Blog of an Etizolam addict and what that entails.
The Blog of an Etizolam addict and what that entails

I don't know if this will be very interesting but my thought was it might be good to share some bits about my Etizolam abuse.

Context: I had been using Etizolam mainly as a comedown drug from other substances for around a year. After failing my dream to become a teacher and some family problems I started taking it while depressed at home to cover up my unhappiness with how my life was going. At the peak of my use I was taking around 7-8mg of Etizolam per day.

Blog 1

I think the first time I realised I had a small problem with Etizolam was after I went away with work staying in a hotel and was packing my bags. “Better pack some benzo's” I thought, I was going for four days and did not want to be in withdraw while with my new work colleagues. So I had a choice, either I had to face to withdraw while away or I could carry on taking them for a few more days and deal with the withdraw over the Christmas period. “Fuck it I'm in a pimp hotel and I am not shaking and sweating in front of all these new people.” I said out load. I was had been talking to myself a fair bit but saw it as reflective, something spiritual other people wouldn't understand.

I took three Etizolam and headed to the bar. I must have drank around four beers knowing then risk but “I was a pretty seasoned drinker” I reasoned and would be fine for work. A few people I had to chat to where in the hotel as well as what looked like the England Rugby Team. “Nah I didn't recognise any faces” I told myself. There was a girl at the bar though who I could chat with rather than all these boring work people. I took a few more Etizolam that I had cunningly placed in my suit pocket for easy access.

I pulled up and stool and the night went well with this beautiful girl until I woke up the next day. My room looked like a bomb shell and the girl from last night was defiantly not as glowing as she looked last night. I left her in my room and headed to the work seminar I had to attend. “God I am bored, I might as well take another Etizolam to get though this day with my wine.” All the work stuff flew past I headed back to my room pretty happy with myself “but wait something wasn't right.” I thought. When I got back to my room my wallet was missing and the girl from the night before as well.

“Haha” I laughed out load, she hadn't taken my laptop, work phone or my stash “what a shit robbery” I jested. Oh well things could be worse, I took another couple of Etizolam and sat down to watch TV.

“Hmm” I reflected again maybe I need to sort this out.

I reasoned with myself that dealing with withdraw over Christmas was the right choice for my career and ultimately me. The idea that I would be able to control quickly when I came straight off such a high dose was delusional and ultimately led me to the place I was in January. Addicted and with a choice of owning up to everyone or facing it alone.
Looking forward to the next part Mes.
Cheers Henrik :)
Sarcastic junkie who likes to write about himself. Don't believe a word. tumbleweed
Yep me too thanks for sharing this Mes hopefully it might make people think twice before going down that very destructive path.
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Thanks for sharing mate. Im sure this will help many people.
Think this is very courageous and amazingly helpful of you, mes :)

Will hopefully attract the attention of some of those eating these like sweeties who may well be getting a bit of a shock in the nearish future.
"It is simply this: do not tire, never lose interest, never grow indifferent—lose your invaluable curiosity and you let yourself die. It's as simple as that" Tove Jansson
Wish you luck mate, I know etiz withdrawals knocked me right on my cunt, and had me reeling for weeks, I'm still taking it easy with the chems cause I don't wanna risk it again! All the best, hit me up if you need a chat, I know what it's like. Can be eating 15, 20 a day and you don't even notice, or feel it! Thankfully, no relapse as I speak!
Thanks everyone I will add to this in the near future.

I have written a fair amount of stuff but will only post the semi coherent bits :)

On another note I was debating in my local drugs project with this guy who believes mixing two very dangerous illegal compounds together is the way forward. Although I didn't agree at all I felt bad for judging the other people at rehabilitation who have been nothing but nice to me. I think my harm reduction advice definitely did not get though but oh well.
Sarcastic junkie who likes to write about himself. Don't believe a word. tumbleweed
Yeah I was bad a while back (between 10-40 a day) but managed to stop completely for a couple months and now i use once a week to once every 2 weeks. I still struggle to feel anything other than absolute monster doses though.

Stupidly at a festival around a month or 2 ago me and 3 friends had 250 between us over 2 and a half days (this was NOT our intention, but you know what its like once you pop you can't stop with these things and you forget you've taken them etc) . Safe to say we cant remember much except numerous police encounters, my friends glassing themselves for fun and refusing to go to hospital, getting kicked out of venue for smoking bud inside numerous times and getting lost ALOT.

Fucking great weekend from what I can remember, but the etiz made us absolute arseholes as we cared about nothing, drinking all day everyday in the middle of the street in the city center.

Be careful with these things they could seriously land you in jail once your inhibitions have gone.

(As always please do NOT touch doses like this I am just trying to warn you off stupid things like this...) Yet for all that I still advocate Etizolam as a good and useful drug if used sensibly and in moderation, which I feel I have managed to do.

Pyrazolam helps alot, to anyone addicted or struggling as they took initially for anxiety, almost completely replacing etiz use recently as now I just take for anxiety. Knowing theres no rec value and they dont make you retarded makes it a hell of a lot easier to not take them, as they are not so much a "cure-all" for your life.

- EDIT I should stress I am trying to warn people off doing stupid things with this not advocate it as looking back at my post seems.
ned - i just wanted a code to go and hav a look but yee hav ruined it now acting like scientolagists with the code...seriously yee say im a prick just take a step back there
^i hear ya bout the etiz binges could land ya in jail happened to a guy i no twice last year

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