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Lyrics so bad that they're brilliant
#31
Stone Roses - Love Spreads

Too much to take
Some cross to bear
I'm hiding in the trees with a picnic
She's over there, yeah
The sun don't go down, it's just an illusion caused by the world spinning round.
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#32
I'm Henry the eighth I am
Henry the eighth I am, I am
I got married to the widow next door
She's been married seven times before
And every one was an Henry (Henry)
She wouldn't have a Willy or a Sam (no Sam)
I'm her eighth old man, I'm Henry
Henry the eighth I am

I'm Henry the eighth I am
Henry the eighth I am, I am
I got married to the widow next door
She's been married seven times before
And every one was an Henry (Henry)
She wouldn't have a Willy or a Sam (no Sam)
I'm her eighth old man, I'm Henry
Henry the eighth I am

I'm Henry the eighth I am
Henry the eighth I am, I am
I got married to the widow next door
She's been married seven times before
And every one was an Henry (Henry)
She wouldn't have a Willy or a Sam (no Sam)
I'm her eighth old man, I'm Henry
Henry the eighth I am

H-E-N-R-Y
Henry (Henry)
Henry (Henry)
Henry the eighth I am, I am
Henry the eighth I am



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#33
David Allan Coe - One More Time

=-O =-o

Yes i know, 'fore you go, i'm gonna miss you
A good piece of ass is hard to find
Before you leave home, go out on your own
I'd just
Like to fuck you one more time

One more time
I'd like to stick my pecker in you
Even if it's just a quickie
I won't mind

No i won't get your new white dress dirty, baby
I'd just
Like to fuck you one more time

There is no need to cry, 'cause you're leavin'
Your mother and me, we ain't blind
We both knew someday, you'll go on your way
And I'd just
Like to fuck you one more time

One more time
I'd like to stick my pecker in you
Even if it's just a quickie
I won't mind

No i won't get your new white dress dirty, baby
I'd just
Like to fuck you one more time

Heaven knows that you've been a good daughter, baby
And I'd just
Like to fuck you one more time

Lord I love it when you call me Daddy
And I'd just
Like to fuck you one more time
One more time



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#34
What
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#35
that definitely is not right
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#36


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#37
The wild dogs cry out in the night
As they grow restless longing for some solitary company
I know that I must do what's right
As sure as Kilimanjaro rises like Olympus above the Serengeti.

Makes me cringe every time I hear company rhymed with Serengeti, I can't say I even like the song, but I never switch off until I've heard that abomination.



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#38
Hmm, spotted this and loved some of the '80s tunes, but the spinal tap reference made me think that there had to be some '80s metal that inspired it.

Luckily I have blocked out most of the Iron Maiden phase of my life, preferring to remember the more socially acceptable Indie and Acid House scenes that ran alongside, but I'll never forget the band with the coolest 12" picture vinyl and the best name in the world... Helloween. [Yep, there's a reason I blocked that phase out...]

Before they went crazy in the early '90s and did a pop album about bubblegum [the first album I ever threw in the bin in disgust, signaling the completion of my metamorphosis from metal to dance until Metallica's Black Album and Nirvanna brought my split personality back] they would throw ballads in amongst their heavier stuff. Unfortunately being busy chaps they obviously didn't have the time to read beyond the first match in their rhyming dictionary. In fact being German chaps they probably didn't have a clue what they were singing about.

So you have to imagine the scene... a german metal band singing about death and gods, long greasy hair and the smell of dirty speed, sweaty moshing in faded black t's to this new creature people are beginning to call power-metal. Then the lights go down, slow power chords creep through the ringing in your ears, for a moment you forcibly block out any image of dire straits from your head, and then you hear:

Here I stand all alone
Have my mind turned to stone
Have my heart filled up with ice
To avoid it's breakin' twice

Thank to you, my dear old friend
But you can't help, this is the end
Of a tale that wasn't right
I won't have no sleep tonight

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=CosVEcg8MAc

Actually with hindsight that's still pretty cool, damn! I knew I should have chosen Dr Stein even if it does still make me want to mosh...

Once they killed his monster when it went into a trap
now he's making better ones on a higher step
Dr. Stein grows funny creatures
lets them run into the night
they become great rock musicians
and the time is right, the time is right!

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=LCDY562QP48


Have you made the effort to listen to your subconscious today? 'Your sake' breakz are as amazing as line times or pin mins.


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#39
In the spirit of German metal bands here is my contribution..


Too big, too small?
Size does matter, after all
Too big, too small?
He could be a little bigger.
Mercedes-benz and Autobahn!
Alone, driving abroad!
Travel, travel! Driving pleasure!
I just wanna have fun, not fall in love!
Just a little bit...
Just a little, bitch!

You've got a pussy,
I have a dick.
So what's the problem?
Let's do it quick.
So take me now,
before it's too late!
Life's too short, so I can't wait!
Take me now! Oh, don't you see?
I can't get laid in Germany...

Too short, too tall?
Doesn't matter, one size fits all!
Too big, too small?
The turnpike should stand up!
Beautiful miss, lust for more?
Blizkrieg, with a rifle of meat!
Schnaps in the head, you lovely lady.
Put a bratwurst in your sauerkraut!

Just a little bit...
Be my little bitch!

You've got a pussy,
I have a dick.
So what's the problem?
Let's do it quick.
So take me now,
before it's too late!
Life's too short, so I can't wait!
Take me now! Oh, don't you see?
I can't get laid in Germany...

Germany!

Germany!


The best part of this song is Mr Blod humming along to it on a Sunday morning cooking breakfast like its some kind of Val Doonican ditty.. I have highlighted the most genius line in the lyrics IMO...
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